Sith Creed

"Peace is a lie. There is only passion. Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power. Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken."
-the Sith Creed

31 May 2016

The Day I Lost Regret

I sit on a thought
    as I decide my fate
an action I should have sought
     a side I should take
     on something I forgot
but think of each night I'm awake.
A Bastion of Hope
A Renaissance of Love
I floated aimlessly on an exhilaration
a madness that accompanies admiration,
a sadness that’s borne from strife,
a sickness that follows the night,
a cosmic jester bent on world domination
yet we have let him
come over us
like a gaudy
vision of truth
A Rekindling of Life?
I can hear your distant cries
yet I cannot pinpoint where they are
or understand what you are saying
does it have anything to do with us being apart
or is it about our love or your weak heart?
We have grown apart in the strangest of ways
we were once one, together.
we were about to give love a name
but it has become a gaseous shape
and has begun to dissipate.
The thunderous storm in the background
has drowned out your voice.
Please speak up
because it sounds as if you are saying:
I love you.
there are more things love will allow
than those it cannot provide for.
Blocking the electrostatic waves of chaos
I bleed from my ears
gaining control of the situation
at hand
by lending a hand
in making a stand
against the ones who won't understand
the ebb and swirl
of a hard up girl
pawing and clawing
upon my shins
cawing and hollering
begging me to forget her sins:
touching me like a friend
trying to pretend
that her sweet song won't end.

Callous to the blah, blah, blah
and the things I saw
the day I awoke
head filled with smoke
the day I was tricked
was the day I realized
by whom.
It happened so quick
when he materialized
inside the room
he possessed my friend
me without knowing
until the lies started flowing
suddenly they stopped
he looked me dead in the eyes
and proceeded to tell me his stories
I couldn't despise
nor could I forget
I saw through the disguise
and I wasn't fortunate
staring deep within
the ripples of vertigo
flashes of hot
flashes of cold
I am spinning out of control
I'm lost within a sea of forgetfulness
because i forgot why I loved you
what it was that started the spark
and what fuel it was that kept it aflame
I'm sliding within the eye of the beholder
constricting her sight
his love
and its thought.
I run deeper than the blatant truths
of nothingness
I exist with more profundity
than the surface that you see
I'm here to expose the truth forever
But don't you ever call me
an American again!
I'm tired of waking up
everyday dispensing life
the same fucked up lie
feeding a fire
that shouldn't burn
tossing bodies onto the ashes
just to stay warm
when you are already in Hell
though you can't tell
because he has placed you all
under a spell
I thought I could change
to find what I truly wanted
but it is not like me
I refuse to stand
on the side
passively, now I want more
more than the jovial
acts of jovial love
I could never love anyone
again through unrequited love
I don't know if I should
thank you
or curse you
for opening my eyes
to what I was doing wrong
while I sang a song
of why I never knew what
true love was
and how I will never know.

Then he spoke
with a voice
that made me choke
and blocking the sounds were not a choice
"Make something happen"
boomed deep within my head
"I've done it before
now it is your turn.
Just start with a microcosm
it's not hard at all."
I took a deep breath
and I felt it stretch
It felt strange but good
I breathed again and
the universe expanded by an inch
the galaxy turned counterclockwise
the solar system, tilted
the sun, contracted
and I took on another cool breath of air
quasars quased
quarks quarked
zeniths zened
and the multiple worlds within me
react with the universe of his own
pulsars pulsed within my chest
then a supernova cracked
lightning flashed
the bacteria shook and quivered at the sight of...
their whole existence being wiped out
before their eyes
by a creature in disguise
whose chainlink nebulae constrict me
from revealing the elliptical orbits of life
so that microbes can digest the sustenance
of my least favorite satellite.
My body is being invaded by viruses and alien invaders
from other inhabitable universes
looking for a place
they too can call home
all because
they too have lost their home
all because
they too will not give up without a fight
I fly toward the sun
like a comet at night
I fly for fun
I fly till the end is in sight
Why now?
I know that in less than a week
you will leave forever
ok then fare thee well
though I am one of the many
that want you to stay
It is forever I don't have
and forever I won't beg you stay
I care not about you anymore
So now I can turn a page
in this chapter of my life.
The Day I Lost Regret
The Day I Grew Old
The Day I Was Born
The Day My Story Was Told
The Day I Was Scorned
The Day I Knew
The Day I Flew
The Day I Will Never Forget

Sidenote: This poem was written in 2005. I posted a copy to my Facebook in 2011. This is the first actual posting/publishing on line. I was bound and determined to have my first book written before I was 26 and this was born Jan 2005. It is a precursor to how I live my life free from regret and miss opportunities. It is the first step I took toward living a fun filled life.

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